The Reunion Show!

Last night I had the opportunity to attend a reunion show of my favorite swing band from ten years ago. I was super excited about hearing the music, dancing, and most of all seeing all my old swing buddies. I had no idea what I was in for!

I read the facebook invite and it read that the reunion show was in Ofallon, Il. Bad because it's a thirty minute drive. Worse, because it's a thirty minute drive to a town next to my hometown! I finally arrive at the conference center and am amazed at the idea that I almost made it through an entire album on the ipod! As I walk in, I see a sea of high school kids in black wandering around. I ask the man at the desk where the Swing band show is, and he looks very puzzled.

"This is the O'fallon High School Jazz Band fundraiser concert."

I must have had a look on my face that represented someone facing a sentencing, because we both just stared at each other. I wandered around the hotel looking for a sign of another concert going on, alas there was none. I grabbed the mobile phone and called a friend and asked her to look at facebook and confirm the address. I explained that I was at some kind of high school concert. She crackberrys the website and laughs out the words,

"Your at the right place."

I then see warming up in a room my best friend, and trumpet player of the band. She ran out to greet me.

"Hey! Am I at the right place?"

She laughed and explained that this was a fundraiser and the high school jazz band was opening for them. It also was an auction with a collection of many autographed items. Including a guitar signed by Taylor Swift, that eventually made a home with a 13 year old boy, who's future is most certainly to be a server in Chelsea. I walked in and immediately found my old buddies. They stood out as bad as I did. Among the sea of Dockers, sequined blazers, and white zinfandel's was our table. Two toned shoes, low cut dresses, and whiskey.

The jazz band wasn't all that bad, and they better not be. Seeing as how their parents had all spent tremendous amounts of money on their instruments. It had it everything you'd expect. Timing issues, nervous solos, bad bassist, and flashbacks. I was sitting next to my old friend Tiffany who's jokes kept my shoulders rocking up and down all night. She is like a red headed George Carlin.

The barry sax player was the best. A fat kid of course. Tiffany leans over to me and says something along the lines of sax practice and masturbation, and i spit my drink out a little. His parents of course were sitting at the table in front of us. They didn't hear what we were saying but we were very unwelcome.

Trying to fit in and not be gawked at like the townie whores we looked like, we got involved in the auction. Of course dropping out every time an item went over $25.00. Finally, the band started!

We hooped and hollered, sang along with every song. Remembered all the audience cues, and were even asked by the band to do some dancing. The rest of the audience glared, glared and, oh yeah, glared at us. The bartender was atrocious! Which I can understand, when all you do is open bud select and pour white zin, but she told me she had no scotch. When I told her she had Dewars, she said "Oh that's whiskey."

When the show ended my friends told me that in a weird coinsidence that the other swing band we used to go to was playing 5 miles away in my hometown. They asked me if I knew where it was, and unlike my sister who has the navigational skills of a GPS, I do not, and did not. Still they asked me to lead the caravan. I of course, drove them to my high school, because that is the only way I could remember to get to Belleville from Ofallon. It was a disaster.

We finally arrived at the right place, and i was attacked by a gentleman (and I use that term loosely) named Roger. Roger was easily 74 years young, and had the breath of a hunter 3 days in the tree stand. He was quite the little dancer, and advancer. We danced many...many songs. My friends and I had a great time, but were getting too sauced to continue our east side adventure and still drive home. It was time to call it a night. I awoke this morning with a fever blister, and can't help thinking that Roger had something to do with it.

The show was a blast, and I hope in another ten years they do another reunion show! Maybe this time they can have a polka group warm up for them, that's the only way they can top all the comedy material we indulged in.

ROCKER TED!